Hokage Desk
Forward to Desk of Hokage: If you’ve ever done research through newspapers and article clippings you will find valuable information from the most random things. You may look at an article, advertisement, or the classified ads, and you will be able to piece together a story with a little bit of imagination. This series is exactly that, it is my attempt to re-fabricate the publications from Konoha, as well as potentially ’stolen’ information from the desk of the Hokage to piece together some background storyline of Naruto. I hope that this series will provide insight to many background factors of Konoha that many of us do not consider and help bring Konoha to life. Also, feel free to create your own judgments from the fabricated articles, pictures, and clippings I have created and see if you can match up a story for this time frame. So, let us take a journey into the world of Konoha and pretend that we are taking part in these publications. A whole new era of Naruto story telling has begun! – Sincerely, Guruku
Bits of information stolen from the Desk of the Hokage and excerpts from the local Konoha Newsletter.
Post Author: Guruku
*Newspaper Undercover Report*
Who is Yamato!
Yamato has recently graduated and become a Jonin Squad Leader. Little is known about Yamato, but he is now eligible to man his own 4 man team, and will proudly serve Konoha. Yamato has recently been seen escorting and working with Naruto and Sakura, formerly of Team 7. Another ninja known as Sai also joined Team 7 under Yamato’s guidance. Little is known about Sai. Hatake Kakashi, also known as the genius Copy Ninja Kakashi, is normally in charge of team 7; yet, seems to be nonchalant about Yamato taking over. Recently, the teams actions have been hidden and secretive. However, our undercover operatives suggests that the team is expanding considering Yamato as a possible substitute for Kakashi. Could Kakashi be promoted to a higher position? Or is Yamato merely assisting Kakashi since Kakashi has taken ill quite a few times this past few months? Our reporter has taken the… (Cont. on Page 4)
*Secret Ninja Classified Files*
*Notes stolen from the desk of Tsunade*
Name: Danzou
Hidden Village: Leaf Village
Rank: Jounin
Notable Features: Bandages over his right eye, missing his right arm
Status: 24/7 Surveillance
Within the ANBU corps., Danzo created and led the training of “Ne” also known as “Root”. Danzo was the former Military General to the Hokage, and is now an advisor. He is aggressive in war and prefers it over peace. He is known to have an iron-clad method of teaching and has been seen in the militaristic manner he trained Root. Following the ninja code of not feeling emotions during a battle, Root, has eliminated all forms of emotions as a training method to increase the success rate of its’ ninjas. However, as the time has progressed, ideas of morality play into its factors. Currently, the Root organization has been disbanded; however, it’s members are seen congregating and meeting in suspicious behavior. Speculations of foul play.
Tsunade’s Notes: An ANBU team has been assigned to keep their eyes on Danzou…. he is on a 24/7 surveillance…. Jiraiya and I discussed about his actions for… speculate his actions are regar… (food stains make rest undecipherable)
*Newspaper clipping*
The Nijū Shotai
Tsunade has officially released and announced the formation of the Niju Shotai: A 20 platoon 4 -cell organization to track down and eliminate the Akatsuki threat. The Niju Shotai consists of 20% of the villages S-Rank, Elite, and Jounin level nin’s. This has been the largest formation for one official cause in many years. Tsunade explains, “Our police force and Leaf Nin’s are on Yellow alert right now. Our villagers should not worry, we have taken measures to ensure the safety and the will of the fire will overcome!” What courageous and uplifting words from our Fifth Hokage! (More information on The Niju Shotai turn to page 4)
*Newspaper article*
Haunted Forest?
Villagers are scared of the nearby Deer Forest and says, “It is a haunted forest!” Lately, villagers have been getting scared over the Deer Forest claiming they hear screams and ghostly sounds within the Forest. There has been more than 12 reports of screams, curses, and other ghostly sounds emanating from the Deer Forest recently. No one knows where or what the sounds are from; however, some villagers like Gankure (age 17) claim, “It sounds like someone is constantly cursing, and screaming to someone named, Jashin.”
The Deer Forest is the center of many medical plants and animals. The extracts from the plants and the local deer antlers have been known to save many lives from the medicine it makes. The Deer Forest is home to 70 different herbal plants, and have helped Konoha with 110 different herbal medicines. The Nara Clan is the clan that moderates and generally maintains the Forest. The Nara Clan has been in charge of the Forest for ages and ages. However, the Nara clan denies any claims of the Haunted forest. Who is Jashin? And what are all the cries that villagers are hearing? Perhaps, it is just a forgotten figment of our imaginations.
*Konoha Library*
*Newspaper article*
Something’s Froggy
An unexplained amount of Toads and Frogs have been seen in the outskirts of Konoha Memorial. There has been an unexplained number of toads and frogs congregating around Konoha Memorial just outside of Konoha’s main villages. These amphibians of various sizes and colors are not native to these lands have become a weird growing phenomenon in Konoha. Many of the frogs are making noises like, “Gama” and “Jirai-Jirai” and our reporters think they are simply adorable. Some villagers claim that the growing size is a problem; however, there is no reason to be alarmed for the toads are not doing anything dangerous, they are merely sitting there as if they were meditating. One villager claims, “They are praying.” We gathered our reporters and analysts to take a look at the site and the only conclusions we could make were that these non-native toads may be the result of de-forestation. Now de-forestation is… (continued on page 5)
*Restaurant advertisement*
The pink thing is to symbolize a tear in a piece of paper, as if the information was stolen from scraps of paper. Get it?! Kukuku… I hope everyone can read this well enough!
(C) Guruku 2008
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lol, awesome ideas you have Guruku….
i may have a few classified info of my own….
on the case of who is Jashin
or the toad problems
Guruku AWESOME Blog !!!!!!You really are great!I love this post.Very informative and the myths and the forest are so cool !It’s great.Kirin is very strange and interesting being.So Sasuke is wise???(hahahaha.No he is not)Hm..loads of frogs huh?Scary haunted forest story and events.I should visit that forest.Dnzou that b****.Guruku Congratulations again.Really great .
nice blog guruku i like the forest and the toads
wicked blog man love the deer forest and toads thing
Great newspaper(blog) Guruku just like the Times.
“The pink thing is to symbolize a tear in a piece of paper, as if the information was stolen from scraps of paper. Get it?! Kukuku… I hope everyone can read this well enough!”
You’re a crafty one, Guruku
This is very interesting an new.
I think naruto will be the first ninja in history to go from genin to kage while skipping all the ranks in between
I attempted to put myself into the place of Konoha reporters for this blog. I really had to strain my brain to consider all areas of what might be going on during this time frame. I also had to consider the villagers and what they would be reporting on or discussing about from an internal perspective void of outside knowledge. It was especially difficult because I wanted to have subtle clues into what the Manga has revealed to us already too; yet, not give it away entirely. At the same time, I wanted to make sure I touched upon many factors in a limited blog space. This task was definitely a challenge.
I found this to be a creative piece where I could also bridge the gap between imaginations and really illustrate some ideas like a “coupon” for Naruto’s favorite Ramen restaurant. I believe this also provides a creative outlet for myself and hopefully help develop characters a little more for you ‘the readers’ to imagine and play around with too.
I hope that this blog will help bring some ideas to the forefront that have been going on in people’s minds but never really answered. For example, the Yamato newspaper piece was supposed to be a reporter who never heard anything about Yamato and found it interesting that he was all of a sudden in charge of team 7. Since, Yamato’s information is classified as an ANBU, the only thing reporters could do is speculate and write ideas. So, the question that I attempted to answer was how an undercover ANBU could become a regular Jounin and fit in.
The “Haunted Forest†was my tip of the hat to Asuma and Shikamaru and his exceptional abilities in killing the undead (or burying him forever). Also it was to help answer some questions like, “What happens to Hidan being in that hole for so long?” Apparently, in this case, he’s haunting people and screaming obscenities.
Regarding “Kirin,†the information provided was to tell people where Sasuke could have potentially knew this information. If we put ourselves in his shoes, he is comparing himself to a god (or a celestial being) and really thinks he is punishing the wicked. If we really think deeply into it, he has lost much sense of reality and feels that he has reached an omniscient being. So, that was my purpose of placing the Konoha Library information there.
The “Something Froggy†was obviously my dedication to Jiraiya Sama. He is by far one of the greatest characters in Naruto, and his untimely death is a sad sight for us all. I wanted to create a situation where the Frog Hermit’s dedicated followers would pay their respects and show some character as his devoted summons. However, the normal villagers of Konoha would be oblivious to this fact, and consider environmental reasons why the frogs are at the Memorial. So this gives a bit of emotion and character to the summon frogs.
Lastly, I hope you all enjoyed reading this blog, and enjoyed the pictures that I tried to fabricate. I understand that this may seem to be bits and pieces of un-finished work; however, I assure you that I kept it that way for a reason. Again, thanks for all the words of encouragement, and I hope you guys will enjoy the second one!
he did say he would do it during the chunin exams. You should something on lee sleep walking… and mabey one about kakashi secertly having a love intrest, Shizune mabey…
Extra!Extra! Shannaro Daily Times get your copy today get em while they’re hot, get em while they’re fresh.
damn I’m getting here too late these days!
Oh good blog Editor-in-Chief. Mind is slipping these days loads of work like school wasn’t enough.
Kakashi secert lover?!?!? My vote goes to the Anbu Yugao Uzuki. LOL
Another excellent and original post, G-man
OMG is that ramen eating Naruto!?
lol … this was cool! Can’t wait for another one, if any.
I think kakashi is goin to be a bachelor forever… He’s just too damn Sexy to be stuck w/ one girl.
What you guys think?
ALSO, if you want to see additional articles written about characters feel free to let me know… I’ll see what I can do! c[=
Nah, kakashi never has time for real girls, on the ones in the paradise novels. Haha
Guruku we deffinetly want more!
very nice blog..hey..how about Tsunade perverted by Konohamaru’s sexy technique only instead of Sasuke and Sai its Dan and Nawaki…
Fifth Hokage scandal..hehehe..she might succumb to perversion like Sakura..who knows? that was just a comment..
What about :
“The Uchiha Massacre and the Village’s reactions” with live footage from the plaace of disaster …. this would be cool
or
“that part in the Anime, if i recall, it was a fun fact, where Yondaime made a short appearance in the hallway, when Naruto was trunning”
— Is the Government hiding something? well, whatever you call it…Hokage-ment
“when Naruto was runningâ€
sorry …. my keyboard shall face the truth of it’s actions…..when i shall smash it to the wall….for it is incompetent….and dusty
HEY what up everyone, Jashin is the evil God that Hidan worships
By the way congrats on becoming an anbu agent septhiroth well earned and deserve. Also i love it Guruku and i want more more more,
(Guruku): “I think kakashi is goin to be a bachelor forever… He’s just too damn Sexy to be stuck w/ one girl.
What you guys think?”
Sexy with his big lips … or buck-teeth? lol. Here’s a thought on Kakashi’s sexiness … He reads those books for tips on how to “do things” and his Sharingan records them. He’s a Kama Sutra expert. He really is a ninja that knows over 1000 techniques. lol. JK!
Seriously though, if I were a girl, I’d choose Kakashi or Asuma over Gai any day. Sorry dude.
Kakashi isn’t ugly just humble, Also Chaos, smashin your keyboard wont make it work better (Unless you view a mild electric shock every time you press a key better)
Score i’m Jounin Elite, but seriously chaos DON’T ANGER THE KEYBOARD GODS, they’re wrathfull enough.
Chaos… so as a Commodore, what do you do?
and the keyboard gods are everywhere! Btw… a recent research stated that the Dirtiest thing inside an office was the Keyboard (Even dirtier than some bathroom toilet seats!!!) Just an fyi… so don’t anger the AFK gods!
awsome blog G
but now i won’t be able to eat ramen cause i’m afraid it might eat me 
“chaos DON’T ANGER THE KEYBOARD GODS”
oh….thanks…..phew….you saved me from an eternal nightmare of dusty keyboards….i’ll just have to buy another one….to repent for what i have said about my keyboard…to make the gods think better of me….
“and the keyboard gods are everywhere! Btw… a recent research stated that the Dirtiest thing inside an office was the Keyboard (Even dirtier than some bathroom toilet seats!!!) Just an fyi… so don’t anger the AFK gods!”
….um….even dirtier that some toilet seats…..now i have a different perspective of my keyboard
“Chaos… so as a Commodore, what do you do?”
What does a Commodore do? well…..um :
Commodore is a Great Shannaro Hentai military rank used in some navies or air forces for officers whose position exceeds that of a captain, but is less than that of a rear admiral. It is sometimes abbreviated as Cdre. (Chaospedia
)
….but i have just been appointed….so J-sama knows more than I about this rank….
hahaha so funny … nice blog dude
Guruku I am out of words.
You must wind a price as the most creative author! This is definitely different.
If you are still in contact with the Editor of Konoha’s Newspaper, please tell him that I will love to see a gossip section. Who is dating whom? He he he
I think we should have a best Blog or Commentor award, however I hate award shows so IDK but this was certainly interesting Guruku.
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